Why Do Midlife Crisis Affairs Never Last?
People looking to get out of their marriage sometimes go through what’s known as a midlife crisis, where they become very aware of their age and look at it with disappointment and frustration. They may look at their life and choices and feel they’ve missed out on so much or are not currently experiencing what they think they deserve to be experiencing. During this time of reflection, some people decide to start an affair, where they find someone new to date who seems appealing in one way or another.
What is a Midlife Crisis?
The traditional definition of a mid-life crisis is hitting a low point in your life, usually at age 40 or 50, where you feel stuck and question whether or not you’ve lived up to your full potential. Many common themes come up during these moments. For one, many people start feeling trapped by their jobs and responsibilities. You might wonder if things would be different if you made some other choices earlier in life.
Perhaps you believe your career is stagnating but rather that your marriage is disintegrating. Whatever it is, it’s hard for people to see past their present circumstances when they hit a low point in mid-life. It’s also common to experience regret about things you did or didn’t do earlier. Many people look back on their 20s and 30s with nostalgia, wishing they had taken more risks or traveled more extensively.
They may think about how much fun it was to party every night instead of going home early because they had work in the morning. When we reflect on our younger selves, we tend to idealize them without considering all of our youthful mistakes. It can really lead people to think that we have squandered excessively time doing what others ought to be doing rather than what we want to do.
What causes midlife crisis in men
A midlife crisis in men may begin as early as their thirties and forties. Still, it may not occur for many men until their fifties or even sixties. A hormonal imbalance is typically cited as a leading cause; most commonly, low testosterone levels are responsible.
These imbalances can be due to numerous factors, including poor diet, stress, and lack of exercise, leading to symptoms such as depression, loss of interest in daily activities, and more. Another common reason behind a man’s change in behavior is his relationship with his partner: If he isn’t satisfied with how his marriage or relationship is going, it can bring out emotions that feel like a change coming over him.
How to tell if your man is having a midlife crisis
He doesn’t want to grow old with you. He starts acting younger than he used to: wearing youth clothes, listening to young music, wanting to travel and live it up, going out with his old friends from high school rather than spending time with you and your friends, and having more sex (with you and someone else). He suddenly starts talking about wanting another child (even though he thinks his kids are ungrateful). Or he wants to have more children—even though there’s a difference between deciding that you want more children and dealing with all of it when they come along!
You think something is wrong, but he won’t talk about it. He keeps saying things like I feel like I’m on an island by myself, or I need to get away for a while. He stops listening to what you say. He does what he wants anyway, even if it means hurting your feelings or doing something dangerous without telling you first (like taking off his bike for days at a time).
He loses interest in sex with you. He says things like I don’t know who I am anymore, I feel like my life has no meaning, or If only my life were different. The signs above are especially true if he’s been through a significant change recently—losing his job or changing jobs; moving; divorcing; becoming widowed; retiring early, having severe health problems, etc. And finally: If your man is considering suicide because of any of these issues–that’s a sign that he’s probably experiencing some mid-life crisis!
Are You Having an Affair with the Wrong Man?
Most women I see at my office who are in a relationship with an insecure man and cheat on their husbands come in claiming they want to fix it. I want my husband to love me like he used to. And while I know she still loves her husband, when we look at why she is having an affair, it isn’t because of sexual attraction; what most of these affairs revolve around is not only attention but adoration.
When someone feels good about themselves and feels as if you appreciate them for who they are, you will be sexually attracted to them. So go out and find someone who truly appreciates you for all that you are. Your marriage may have a fighting chance at surviving infidelity.
Why Most Infidelity Discovered in Mid-Life Doesn’t Last
Infidelity is all about sex. People who become attracted to others outside their marriages because of boredom or marital dissatisfaction with their partner think that real love will rescue them from ever having to choose between someone else and their partner. That couldn’t be more wrong!
In truth, infidelity often arises from more profound issues than just a simple lack of desire for one’s spouse. Affairs don’t bring passion back into an otherwise passionless marriage. Instead, they cover up deeper problems as long as they last.
Conclusion
A mid-life crisis affair never lasts – get over it, don’t hold onto it: A midlife affair is always doomed for failure no matter how exciting and exhilarating it may be in its infancy stages. You’re already committed to your spouse, who has just as much right to your loyalty and faithfulness.
If you’re going through a midlife crisis, try to make it through without straying or pining too long over your supposed one true love. You’ve committed yourself to another person, and that commitment is forever. Do not break that trust!